airport guide

know before you go: Los Angeles (LAX)

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I have often called LAX the eighth portal of hell, and I mean it.  There is no worse pain than landing at LAX on a Friday afternoon/night.  Well, maybe there is if you’re Chrissy Teigen and John Legend.  Y’all need to stop what you’re doing right now and read about their 8 hour flight from LAX to LAX due to a passenger snafu last night.  I would die.

Anyway, if you’re flying into LA, hope you didn’t make any plans because you’ll be stuck for an hour before you can even reach Century or Sepulveda Blvds.  It has one of the worst traffic flow designs of any place that is allegedly supposed to serve that many people.  Like the architect deliberately thought, how can we purposely make it so there’s only one route out that bottlenecks like crazy?

Even though it one of the worse places on this planet (you think I’m exaggerating.  I am not), it’s a necessary evil that has to be dealt with because you can fly almost anywhere from there.  One of the busiest airports by volume, if you’ve flown internationally from SoCal, you’ve likely flown out of LAX.  It is the second busiest airport in the US by passenger load, and maybe for this week it is a little better than the busier ATL (at least there’s power).

There are 8 numbered terminals separate from the Tom Bradley International terminal.  1= Southwest; 2 = Delta and SkyTeam members: Aer Lingus, WestJet, Virgin, Aeromexico.  3 = Delta, Copa, Avianca, Interjet; 4 = American 5 = American, Hawaiian, JetBlue, Allegiant, Frontier, Spirit, Sun Country. 6 = Alaska, Virgin America, Air Canada, Mokulele, Great Lakes. 7 and 8 = United.  There are random exceptions in terms of check in counters for some of the international carriers of the codeshare alliances, but all international flights return to Tom Bradley (TBIT).

I will give it one thing though, there’s some good shopping there, particularly duty free.  And if you’re uber wealthy, there are separate luxury lounges that are not connected to the terminals where you can get checked in and taken to your plane by SUV.  There could be more restaurants, as the selection is dispersed sparingly amongst the terminals.

Remember: ✈️ = welcome to the jungle to ✈️✈️✈️✈️✈️ = i love LA (we love it)

Convenience to the city: ✈️  (theoretically it is, practically it is not; may the odds be ever in your favor if you’re flying in during peak hours, rideshares help but it takes awhile)

Ease of navigating through terminals: ✈️  (you’re at the mercy of shuttle buses on the tarmac that wind passengers around planes from terminal to terminal)

Convenience of check in/security lines: ✈️✈️ ✈️ (fairly efficient for its size)

Dining: ✈️✈️✈️ (three planes because the eateries are good, but limited in each terminal, so there’s not that many given options.  But…you should look for Ink.sack by Michael Voltaggio in TBIT, La Brea Bakery in Terminal 1, lots of Coffee Beans and Starbucks as well as local coffee shops around; Pinkberry locations, Panda Expresses, Shake Shack in terminal 3, Wolfgang Puck eateries in 6, the Habit and Wahoo’s fish tacos in 6; LA’s hipcute cafeteria Lemonade in 5, Umami Burger, 800 Degrees Pizza, SlapFish, etc)

Bathrooms: ✈️  (don’t expect them to be that clean unless you’re in a recently renovated terminal)

Charging stations/wifi: ✈️✈️  (no free wifi, which makes complete sense)

Amenities: ✈️✈️✈️ (every lounge ever (including a luxe Qantas), retail from bliss spa, Spanx to Burberry, Gucci, Hermes, Harley Davidson — wish there were more options per terminal, but hey real estate is a premium here.  I took one plane off because the Sanrio store closed.  Also, don’t forget to check out the spacey Theme Building on arrival, home of the former Encounters restaurant (wasn’t actually that bad food wise) but now is a viewing deck on the weekends)

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know before you go: Long Beach (LGB)

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As we start traveling for the holidays, I have to shout out to one of my home airports.  Ah Long Beach, a lovely little secret.  I like flying into this tiny regional airport.  It’s no frills, quick, easy and it makes you feel like you’re in the 60s or something because you go out directly onto the tarmac when you come and go.

LGB is a hub for JetBlue, but now Southwest even has some flights out of here. There a couple of regional Delta and American flights as well. It’s one small terminal split into North and South concourses with 11 gates for the whole airport.  JetBlue has gates 1-5. There’s not much food, but what are you doing eating at the airport? You’re likely coming from LA/OC anyway.

Overall it’s a nice airport to get from point A to point B quickly.  The fact that you can skip LAX to get to NY and Boston from this no fuss airport is awesome and worth giving up on amenities and dining.

Remember: ✈️ = so much drama in the LBC to ✈️✈️✈️✈️✈️ = sublime

Convenience to the city: ✈️ (it’s in Long Beach, off the 405, may the odds be ever in your favor)

Ease of navigating through terminals: ✈️✈️✈️✈️  (I think it takes 5 minutes from one end to the other)

Convenience of check in/security lines: ✈️✈️✈️✈️ (not a lot of traffic = fast lines)

Dining: ✈️ (bring your own food)

Bathrooms: ✈️✈️ (not that many of them)

Charging stations/wifi: ✈️✈️ (free wifi available)

Amenities: ✈️ (what are amenities?)

 

 

 

know before you go: Dallas (DFW)

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The Big D is so big, it has two major airports serving it, Love Field and the larger Dallas-Fort Worth.  Because I am a Southwest frequent flier, I’ve been through Love Field several times, but recently I had a very quick layover at DFW (like just barely made it).

It is gigantic, the third busiest airport in the US, behind Atlanta and O’Hare by flights.  It is second only to Denver in terms of actual acreage, and in that acreage is a plethora of eateries and shops.  Everything IS bigger in Texas.

There are 165 gates split amongst five terminals A-E, connected by a convenient skylink train.  Each terminal is semi-circular and when you look at the complex from above, it kind of looks like three turtles in a row (there is a future F terminal completing the last oval).

American Airlines has its hub at DFW, so every terminal operates its flights.  United, Frontier, JetBlue, WestJet, Air Canada and Spirit operate out of E and International flights are located in the D terminal.  This airport has the distinction of being one of the few airports that serve more than 200 destinations.

Remember: ✈️ = D-town (Dallas’ worst nickname) to ✈️✈️✈️✈️✈️ = jerry’s world

Ease of navigating through terminals: ✈️✈️✈️ (immense distance, made better by train)

Dining: ✈️✈️✈️✈️✈️ (Wingstop, Chick-Fila, IHOP, McDs, Starbucks, Peet’s, Caribou, ethnic foods, Cantina Laredo and other airport mainstays.  But it gets a 5 plane rating for Garrett’s popcorn alone)

Bathrooms: ✈️✈️✈️  (clean, well spaced)

Charging stations/wifi: ✈️✈️✈️ (free wifi available via AT&T)

Amenities: ✈️✈️✈️✈️  (American and International Lounges, a few luxury shops including Kate Spade, Tumi, Longchamp; XpresSPa, 7-Elevens, Yoga Studio, Animal hotels)

 

know before you go: Newark (EWR)

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I hadn’t been to Newark Liberty (EWR) in years, like more than a decade, and it has changed considerably for the better.  One of the airports serving NYC as well as most of the Garden State, it has very heavy traffic.  There were people everywhere.

We’re talking a TON of restaurants, shops and amenities.  It’s still crowded, and the addition of said trendy restaurants in the middle of the concourses narrows the walking path quite a bit. But, at least there’s stuff to see and do.

I was really pleasantly surprised at the amount of food choices and the presence of the Global Food Bazaar, although ramen, pizza and philly cheesesteaks doesn’t quite scream “global” to me…but at least they tried.

There are 121 gates in three terminals A-C, each with three concourses.  A serves JetBlue, Alaska, Virgin, Southwest, Air Canada, American, United Express.  B is international, Delta and Spirit.  C is United and is the terminal I passed through (i.e walked circles in).  If you’re flying in from the north, sit on the left side of the plane.  You’ll catch a great view of Manhattan and will even be able to see the lights of Times Square from very high up (think about all that energy being used!)

Remember: ✈️ = EW-R to ✈️✈️✈️✈️✈️ = the Boss

Convenience to the city: ✈️✈️✈️ (airtrain connects to the train/amtrak station which will connect you basically everywhere in the tri-state area)

Ease of navigating through terminals: ✈️✈️ (the hallways are narrow because of restaurants taking up the middle portion)

Dining: ✈️✈️✈️✈️✈️ (Global Bazaar food market, CBGB, all sorts of chains, upmarket restaurants/bars, fast casual bistro types, Dumpling Bar–I would skip this food is meh, neapolitan pizza, french brasserie, steakhouse, sushi/ramen, oyster bar — like everything you could want at exorbitant prices)

Bathrooms: ✈️✈️  (clean but there could be more of them dispersed)

Charging stations/wifi: ✈️✈️✈️ (free wifi available, plentiful charging)

Amenities: ✈️✈️✈️✈️  (the shops are a little weird, America! store? Swatch? There is a Metropolitan Museum of Art store so that’s a plus, CBGB’s, spas–mainly the things to see here are food based and of course, people watching–the best activity on layover)

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how bazaar

 

 

 

know before you go: Portland (PDX)

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Portland is probably one of the best airports in which you can hope to have a layover. Two words: movie theater.  Beyond that, the airport really strives to make it about PDX eats and treats, featuring many local restaurants and breweries, including the House Spirits Distillery.  The stores featured are mostly local brands, which is great because PDX originated companies include Nike, Columbia, Pendleton and Powell’s Books. It really is a destination on its own, with a personality befitting the city it serves.

PDX also boasts incredible views as you are flying to and fro.  If you’re flying south, make sure you sit on the left side of the plane, as you’ll likely be privy to a gorgeous sighting of Mount Hood.  So amazing.

Located about 12 miles from downtown, there is one terminal building split into North and South Terminals which are connected by a walkway.  South has three concourses A (Alaska), B (American), and C (JetBlue).  North has D (Delta) and E (Southwest and United).  There’s a total of ~65 gates.

Remember: ✈️ = trapped in an episode of portlandia to ✈️✈️✈️✈️✈️ = just do it

Convenience to the city: ✈️✈️✈️ (not too far and there’s also light rail to downtown)

Ease of navigating through terminals: ✈️✈️✈️ (there are people movers)

Convenience of check in/security lines: ✈️✈️✈️✈️ (not too crowded, flows easily)

Dining: ✈️✈️✈️✈️✈️ (They also have a food truck area here! Mauritian food, Korean. Kenny & Zuke’s, Laurelwood Brewery, Rogue Brewery, Bambuza, Blue Star donuts, Rose’s.  There’s also everything from McDonald’s to sit down fare like Stanford’s surf and turf.)

Bathrooms: ✈️✈️✈️  (clean)

Charging stations/wifi: ✈️✈️✈️ (free wifi available)

Amenities: ✈️✈️✈️✈️✈️  (Alaska, Delta, United Lounges.  Live music, movie theater –15 min short films, local shopping, this airport has it all!)

 

 

know before you go: Burbank

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Hollywood Burbank Airport (BUR, formerly known as Bob Hope) is the small airport that also serves the greater Los Angeles area, namely more convenient for Pasadena/Glendale/Valley area.  This is the airport you want to fly into if you’re headed to LA.  I cannot stress this enough, bypass the pit of despair that is LAX (unless of course you’re international, then of course, vaya con dios).

There are two terminals, A and B.  A serves Southwest, JetBlue and American with 9 gates and B has 5 serving Alaska, Delta and United.

There’s not much to eat here, but there is Guy Fieri Burger and a Peet’s coffee, and really what more do you need in life?

Remember:  ✈️ = bob nope ✈️✈️✈️✈️✈️ = bob dope

Convenience to city = ✈️✈️✈️✈️ (it cannot be overstated how much easier than LAX it is)

Ease of navigating through terminals: ✈️✈️✈️ (it is very small, so it’s easy)

Convenience of security lines: ✈️✈️✈️ (small = fast)

Dining: ✈️ (Peet’s, Fresco and Guy’s burgers)

Bathrooms: ✈️✈️ (clean, not that many)

Charging stations/wifi: ✈️✈️✈️ (free wi-fi, good amount of outlets)

Amenities: ✈️ (there’s usually some art or collections displayed)

know before you go: Bangkok (BKK)

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Suvarnabhumi Airport in Bangkok, Thailand is one of the largest (4th) and busiest (20th) in the world.  Certainly it is the busiest in Thailand, as the popular tourism destination brings more than 50 million passengers through each year.  It is the hub for Thai and Bangkok airlines, so you’re likely to spend more than a few hours here if you’re heading to Chiang Mai or Phuket via those airlines.  I, in fact, have spent one night in Bangkok (Airport).  Sorry, not sorry.

Be aware that there are some unscrupulous individuals looking to pray on tourists by acting as unofficial tour guides and cab drivers.  Be safe and be careful, as these people can be very slick and in some cases have relationships with airport workers.  Check and double check that is via the most legitimate channel before going anywhere with anyone.

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It is about 16 miles from the city center, and depending on the traffic, it can take a long time to get there.  You can also get to and from the airport via rail.  There is one main terminal split into 7 concourses A-G with about 120 gates, with C-G serving international flights.

There’s a ton of things to see here, and it holds the distinction of being one of the most instagrammed airports in the world.  There’s statues depicting Thai folklore, there’s Garudas in the departure ticketing area.  There’s actual plays and live music depicting Thai legends before you even enter the main terminal.  It’s a great place to have a layover, but if you’re so inclined, there’s also a Novotel Hotel on site.

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There’s basically a high end mall’s worth of shops here: Armani, Burberry, Celine, Chanel, Chopard, Dior, Fendi, Ferragamo, Gucci, Hermes, Longchamp, Prada and Zegna.  There’s airline lounges abound, and I will say the Bangkok Airlines lounge has really great snacks and juices available.

The food options are just okay.  There are a lot of fast food options, asian and grab and go mostly, but there’s Burger King, Starbucks and a Kinramen, which has a decent bowl of ramen.  There’s a lot of Thai coffee shops and also a Mango Tree, which is an international chain.  The thing I don’t love is that the asian food is located near the asian airlines, while the western food is near the flights from US and Europe.  There’s a lot of walking involved in this airport.

Remember: ✈️ =  thai again to ✈️✈️✈️✈️✈️ = thai to stay here as long as possible

Convenience to the city: ✈️✈️  (taxi, rail, a little far from the city)

Ease of navigating through terminals: ✈️✈️✈️  (very large, a lot of walking)

Convenience of check in/security lines: ✈️✈️  (it’s a very busy airport)

Dining: ✈️✈️✈️  (could be better)

Bathrooms: ✈️✈️ (there could be more available, like I said there’s a lot of walking)

Charging stations/wifi: ✈️✈️✈️ (free wifi not available, decent amount of charging)

Amenities: ✈️✈️✈️✈️  (lots of things to see, Thai souvenir handicrafts and shops, airline lounges, observation deck)

 

 

know before you go: Nashville (BNA)

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In honor of the CMA’s happening tonight, there is even more travel in and out of BNA than usual.  Nashville International Airport has got to be one of the most rapidly growing airports in the world.  It is packed every time I come here, and they’re adding routes one after the other.  They will surely have to undertake a large scale addition, which is in the works for the next few years–especially since British Airways is adding flights to London in 2018 via Dreamliner.

It’s about 10 miles from Downtown and traffic usually isn’t too bad.  As it is right now, there’s one main terminal with 47 gates split amongst four concourses (although the fourth is inactive). A is United and Air Canada, B is Alaska, Frontier, JetBlue, Delta and WestJet.  C is Southwest and American.

This is a pretty fun airport in terms of layovers.  There’s not the best food, but there’s live music/entertainment, which makes the time fly, as it were.  There’s an actual branch of Tootsie’s, the famous Honky Tonk from Lower Broad.  There’s large, clean bathrooms, and it’s pretty easy to navigate.

Security can be heavy at times, and a little slow, so plan accordingly.  There’s also always a high chance you’ll see someone famous walking through the crowd, so keep your eyes peeled (flights to NY and LA are most fruitful).

Remember: ✈️ =  achy, breaky, heart to ✈️✈️✈️✈️✈️ = like it, love it, want some more of it

Convenience to the city: ✈️✈️ (~20 minute drive)

Ease of navigating through terminals: ✈️✈️✈️  (it’s not very big, but can be a hike to the end of the terminal)

Convenience of check in/security lines: ✈️✈️ (sometimes it can take a very long time to get through this line)

Dining: ✈️✈️✈️  (Burger King, O’Charley’s, Starbucks, Familia, Tootsie’s, Whitt’s BBQ)

Bathrooms: ✈️✈️ (could have more, but they’re pretty big)

Charging stations/wifi: ✈️✈️ (free wifi available, decent amount of charging)

Amenities: ✈️✈️✈️ (live music that is better than most popular bands, minimal shops, pretty good people watching)

Rental car facility ✈️✈️✈️ (connected to the terminal, hours can be weird)

 

know before you go: SNA airport

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John Wayne Airport/Santa Ana (SNA) is the small airport that serves big Orange County, California.  It is my hometown airport, and I’ve probably flown out of here hundreds of times.  If you’ve ever flown out of SNA, you know that because of ordinances imposed by the neighboring beach cities, the planes have to cut their engine power down to 50% when they take off.  That’s the most annoying thing about the airport, but luckily there are other reasons that make this airport worth choosing.

Namely, it is very easy to navigate.  There’s only one concourse with three terminals A-C, ~20 gates, so it is very easy to travel from one end to the other.  Also, security is typically a breeze to get through.  It is incredibly easy to be dropped off and picked up, and the traffic flows well,  despite being located in Southern California.  For being a small airport, there are pretty good food options: Carl’s Jr (also known as Hardee’s, but originated from OC), Pei Wei, McDonald’s, Starbucks, Zov’s (local favorite), Subway and Pinkberry.  The hours are not that great though.  There are also a few sit down bars including an Anaheim Ducks sports bar.

The best thing about it, is that there is easy freeway access from the 405, 5, 55 freeways.  You can reach it from almost everywhere in Orange County in 15-20 minutes (including Disneyland) when traffic is light, and this saves you a lot of time.  Flights run a little higher than other airports, but you’re paying for convenience to avoid the portal of hell that is LAX.  Again, no airport lounges, but not too many long international layovers happening here.  This is the airport to take if you’re on your way to Disneyland.  If you can swing the higher expense, do it, it’s so worth it.

Remember:  ✈️ = unhappiest place on earth ✈️✈️✈️✈️✈️ = skip disneyland, stay here

Ease of navigating through terminals: ✈️✈️✈️✈️ (there’s just one, it’s easy)

Convenience of security lines: ✈️✈️✈️ (pretty fast)

Dining: ✈️✈️ (selection is good, but the hours are poor)

Bathrooms: ✈️✈️ (very spread out)

Charging stations/wifi: ✈️✈️✈️ (free wi-fi, have little cubby desks where you can charge)

Amenities: ✈️ (there’s usually some art or collections displayed)

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know before you go: MSP

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F7B6AB76-AA9E-46B3-BA42-0EF876238C17MSP and I have a long history together, back to the days when it was a Northwest Airlines hub.  Now it’s transferred into Delta’s hands, it’s a popular layover site for bicoastal travel through that airline.  And it’s a really nice airport.

Located 10 miles from the city, there’s a very convenient light rail Blue line train that will get you there quickly.  The Blue line also goes beyond the airport to the Mall of America too, making it easy to get to the airport from either destination.

You can probably skip the MoA because the middle area is like its own mall, with decent shopping.  There’s a lot of food options, especially the cool “food truck” area with different cuisines and styles of food.  They have really good bakeries here, too.

There are ~115 gates split into two terminals named after famous son: Lindbergh and Humphrey.  Lindbergh Terminal 1 is further divided into 7 concourses A-G–most airlines.  Humphrey Terminal 2 is made up of concourse H and serves regional and Southwest.

Remember: ✈️ = when doves cry to ✈️✈️✈️✈️✈️ = party like it’s 1999

Convenience to the city: ✈️✈️✈️✈️ (quick train ride from the city)

Ease of navigating through terminals: ✈️✈️✈️ (it’s a large airport, and getting from one end to another takes a hike)

Convenience of check in/security lines: ✈️✈️✈️✈️ (apparently they have the best k-9 unit in the country, extra points for the dogs)

Dining: ✈️✈️✈️✈️ (The food truck area is awesome and is something I haven’t seen in many other places.  Decent choices, running the gamut from Chick Fil-A to Mill City Tavern.  Actually there’s an abundance of brewery/pub restaurants and fast casual)

Bathrooms: ✈️✈️✈️ ✈️(seems like there is  always someone cleaning them, has art)

Charging stations/wifi: ✈️✈️✈️  (free wifi available)

Amenities: ✈️✈️✈️✈️✈️ (Delta, United Lounges.  Decent shopping, live music, chiropractor, Snoopy.  There’s an actual 1/4 mile walking path for exercise–there’s a reason why MN is the country’s healthiest state and it starts here in the airport)